Hearing the Heart

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I think the worst downfall for me is a transition. I mean really how much of us like drastic changes? I know for me I fight with all that I have and the funny thing is I always end up loving the difference. That is where I am currently, right smack dab in the middle of hard change. ( I am sighing at this moment whispering. It is, what it is.) One of my commentaries said: ” Sighing is just groan for home, a cry for redemption.”

Psalm 38:9 ESV

O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you.

 

Even my subtle sigh is heard, nothing missed by the sovereign ears of God. There is great comfort in that for us today. That we would be understood by the creator of life, acknowledged by the lifter of our head’s. It seems when I am tossed around in the waves my heart goes directly to the Psalms, such practical and heartfelt cries to the Lord.  That He not only hears my physical cries, but even more, He actually listens and knows the ache of the heart like a melody.

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Psalm 139:3-4 TPT ( Passion Translation)

You are so intimately aware of me, Lord. You read my heart like an open book and you know all the words I’m about to speak before I even start a sentence! You know every step I will take before my journey even begins.

 

I am reminded to give Him the invitation to search my heart throughout my life. Not just while the ache is the loudest, but when the ache is dull. Continually search and know my heart, Lord.

Psalm 139:23 TPT (Passion Translation)

God, I invite your searching gaze into my heart. Examine me through and through; find out everything that may be hidden within me. Put me to the test and sift through all my anxious cares.

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I invite you today, maybe if you are in the middle of rough transition and your heart is just aching. I merely want to remind you we are all on a journey. A journey with God through this life into the next. A mission is often long and challenging, but it is worth every step. Don’t give up now! Just because you are on the beginning of a new path doesn’t mean that He is not with you. The route could be dark with a blanket of dense fog appearing, but what gives illumination is the beautiful unfolding of His word. It will cast light on the next step. Hang in there, keep praying, keeping reading your Bible, most of all keep worshiping through the transition there is power in His presence.

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Psalm 119:130 ESV

The unfolding of your words gives light; it imparts understanding to the simple.

 

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This simple truth sets an aching heart upright and redirects us right back into the loving gaze of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior.

Psalm 46:10 ESV

“Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!”

 

 

The Deceitful Distractions

Luke 10:38-42English Standard Version (ESV)

Martha and Mary

38 Now as they went on their way, Jesus[a] entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. 39 And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching.40 But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” 41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, 42 but one thing is necessary.[b] Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”

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This small bit of info in the scriptures has always intrigued me. I mean I get the spiritual implication here. I know that we can get so caught up in serving that we forget to come to Jesus in prayer and allow Him to teach us His word. What I really want to focus in on is Jesus reply to Martha. After she has what I call a spiritual breakdown and physical fatigue meltdown.

The reason we react just like Martha in our journey with Jesus is:

1.) We are distracted

Just like it says here in verse forty, 40 But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.”

Martha was distracted with much serving and not enough time with Jesus who gives rest

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When we have a distracted mind frame, we are spread thin. Troubled mindset is always related to not taking our cares to God in prayer. We think we can just “handle it” “we believe God has strengthened us enough to take care of it” or “We might even find it is just not important enough to vocalize to God.” We are carrying loads of emotion, regret, and shame and suppressing it instead of sharing it with the burden carrier. This leads straight to excuses then before you know it we have arrived at distracted danger. You know it could be as little as someone said something to you that hurt you to the core. It could be that you are struggling financially, it could be that you are having major problems in your relationships with your loved ones. All these things have the potential to distract us from the word of God. Oh, how guilty of this I am. No matter how mature or immature I appear or even am, I still need to reset and rest at the feet of Jesus.  That will never change, His Word says:

Matthew 11:28

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

 

2.) We become impatient

Martha says directly to Jesus ” Lord! Do you even care that my sister has left me alone to serve? Tell her to help me!!!!

 

 

So, when we become distracted any little infraction becomes gigantic and we microscope everything, everyone, every situation. We are walking around like a nuclear bomb waiting to unleash on everyone and everything. We are bubbling over with cares concerns, and criticisms that have not been passed through the Word of God or at the feet of Jesus. We are wired like eight-day clocks.  This is stress, it is building up because we are holding it in. Again, no matter how far I grow up in Christ. If I am not careful, I naturally get to a place where I begin to do this. Jesus knows this and is well aware of “What is actually eating at Gilbert Grape.” This is when we should be clued in, this is when the Holy Spirit is saying ” Come to me, I will give you comfort, rest, assurance.” Our instinct is to hold it in, but Jesus is saying ” Tell Me, what is bothering you.” If we do what the Word of God says:

1Peter 5:7

7  casting all your care on Him, because He cares about you.

You know Martha is not the only person to think that God did not care about a circumstance. The disciples also did the same thing in

Mark 4:38.

38  But He was in the stern, sleeping on the cushion. So they woke Him up and said to Him, “Teacher! Don’t You care that we’re going to die?”

The boat was catching water, it was tipping back and forth, so many men crammed in, lighting striking all around, wind blowing them down. You get the picture! Yet in letting the storm distract them, they grew impatient. They cried out and accused The Lord of not caring about their lives. Sound familiar??? I know it does to me! I am so thankful for infinite grace and renewed mercies every day for all of us.

The third and final point I want to draw out is

3.) Jesus is faithful, even when we are distracted and impatient.

Even in our distraction and impatience Jesus still answer’s us. He calms us down and say’s to us just what He said to Martha

41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things,

Jesus knows what really is bothering Martha, she is trying to carry all of it on her shoulders. She is trying to control and she can not, she is trying to rely on herself instead of Jesus, she is not allowing herself enough time with Jesus to unload her cares and concerns to Jesus who gives rest.

We are all Martha’s at times, we just have to remember that there is always a pair of feet we can come and rest at.

Phillipans 4:6

6 Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.

Luke 12:22

22  Then He said to His disciples: “Therefore I tell you, don’t worry about your life, what you will eat; or about the body, what you will wear. 

I love a comma, I love that there is something that follows right behind what we know we should already do. It is called God’s grace, and without it, we are bankrupt. It is how love endures and never fails.

Notice after Jesus tells Martha what the real problem is he follows up with an invitation at least that is what I see in this scripture.

41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, 42 but one thing is necessary.[b] Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”

 

 

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But one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the right portion, which will not be taken away from her.”

Jesus is telling Martha ” That can wait, Martha, come and join Mary and sit at my feet and listen.

Jesus said one thing is necessary for us to continue to move forward in our relationship, our callings, our season’s of life. That is that when we feel overwhelmed, defeated, anxious, upset, angry or happy, joyful, and rejoicing that we make time for us to sit at the feet of Jesus and listen to what He says and teaches us, daily. He invites us, He never forces. He will remain to wait even when we come to Him asking with prayer ” Lord! DO YOU EVEN CARE!”

Of course, He cares, He is just not distracted by the storm like we are. He is the living God, nothing moves Him; except us. He moved from His throne to save us. He moves on our behalf every day. He is our all in all; our Champion. Our Hero.

Psalm 16:5  Lord, You are my portion hand my cup of blessing; You hold my future

Psalm 27:4  I have asked one thing from the  Lord; it is what I desire: to dwell in the house of the  Lord all the days of my life, gazing on the beauty of the  Lord and seeking Him in His temple

Remember our work is unto the Lord

John 6:27

27  Don’t work for the food that perishes d but for the food that lasts for eternal life,  which the Son of Man  will give you, because God the Father has set His seal of approval on Him.”

 

 

 

Is silence golden? Or is it marvelous?

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Silence is a strange thing in today’s time. We have so many ways of communication and staying in touch. Sometimes they are wonderful and sometimes they can fuel the biggest commotion and ruckus we have ever seen. I am reminded this morning of

Ecclesiastes 3:1  ESV For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:

 

In Mark 15:4

Pilate asked Jesus: “Do You answer nothing? See how many things they testify against YOU!”

I LOVE verse five

But Jesus still answered nothing, so that Pilate marveled.

Oh! If we would just be still and quiet. I believe with all my heart even in the midst of our trials or triumphs, remaining still and quiet means we are firmly residing on the cornerstone. I know this is seemingly impossible to us, but with the power of God abiding in our hearts we can.

Psalm 46:10 “Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!”

 

Jesus knew by remaining quiet the Father’s will would be carried out to His own crucifixion. That is why I believe He stayed quiet. I also believe that our tongue can get us into more trouble that we like to think. In the book of James, we see just what the tongue is truly like.

James 3:6 – And the tongue [is] a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.

Proverbs 18:21 – Death and life [are] in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.

My Favorite and actually the verse I want you to recognize here

Proverbs 15:28 – The heart of the righteous studieth to answer: but the mouth of the wicked poureth out evil things.

Jesus upheld this verse in Mark 15:4 He knew it was not the time nor the place to speak up or speak out against something. In verse 5 we see Jesus’ silence marvels Pilate.

Marveled means:

mar·vel

/ˈmärvəl/

verb

  • 1.be filled with wonder or astonishment:“she marveled at Jeffrey’s composure”synonyms:be amazed, be astonished, be surprised, be awed, stand in awe, more

noun

 

I mean here is Pilate looking straight into the eyes of the King of Kings and he is marveled by silence. That is Jesus, he is marvelous! Pilate was in the presence of marvel. Even though Pilate did not trust in Jesus, He still could not help to be filled with wonder and astonishment to behold a miracle from God, His name is Jesus.

Today, as you are going throughout your day, I want you to be reminded that even Jesus was still while being accused, while totally and utterly innocent. Maybe, you find yourself in a similar situation where you are constantly wrongly accused, and you want to speak on your behalf. I will tell you to trust in Jesus and be still and know that He is God and that no matter what happens from those accusations or unjustified circumstances. That your silence will marvel someone! You not taking up for yourself and or adding to the problem could marvel someone right to the feet of Jesus. Keep mimicking Jesus. He will never lead you astray, and Jesus is always fighting our battles.

 

Couple more scriptures to remind you:

Psalm 37:7 Be still in the presence of the LORD, and wait patiently for him to act. Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes.

 

Psalm 62:5-6 My soul, wait suddenly for God alone, For my expectation is from Him. 6 He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be moved

 

John 16:33 I have told you this so that through me you may have peace. In the world you’ll have trouble, but be courageous—I’ve overcome the world!

 

Romans 12:12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

 

Silence is golden, my friend

Being still in the midst of chaos is the marvelous power of Jesus Christ. The power that rolled the stone away, the power that sent life, a way to Heaven, and the truth to us.  – Kimberly Ferren

 

I know remaining quiet is hard, I am praying for you today. I am asking the Lord to take the desire out of us to defend ourselves. To be aware when the enemy is doing all that he can to disarm, discredit, disable us. We can fight, we get to choose Jesus or the world. We have a say, don’t ever let our enemy fool you otherwise.

Romans 6:6 ESV

We know that our old self-was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin.

 

One last thought……

 

Today I want you to know or at least read that you are justified and redeemed by the blood of Jesus Christ. He is your help in ever-present trouble which is this world.

The Lord knows how to rescue godly men from trials.
(2 Peter 2:9)

 

He knows! <3

You and you alone, are the restorer

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This week I have been humbled! It hurts! The flesh wants to live, boy, does it ever! This is the crazy part knowing that no matter what is right and what is wrong; it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that healing takes place and only Jesus can lead in that. There are these few moments we get to share life with people. I mean God says our lives are like a vapor (James 4:14). I don’t know about you but have you seen a mist? I mean it’s there then poof it is gone!

Sometimes, we have just to choose to love when it is hard. We have to allow that spirit of religion and tradition to lay down and let Christ prevail entirely. I know in my ability, I do not have what it takes to love correctly. I have fought all week with my decision. I see God confirmed and I know this is His will. I’ve known that for two years I have been on His shoulders healing from a deep hurt. I know I am relieved and ready. The problem with this is while I was recovering many took it as abandoning. I am not asking for anyone to understand and I know what it looked like, and frankly, I did jump ship. That is so hard for me to say but, it is the truth. I did thoroughly and utterly fail miserably, and when the enemy saw fit to attack, he did. I did not know that it would be so brutal. I underestimated my enemy. I did fight, and by no means was I a babe in Christ. I just was a babe in Christ when it came to spiritual warfare. God, had no choice but to teach me on a field trip of sorts.

I want to speak to those who are wounded right now. I want to acknowledge your hurt and pain in whatever capacity that may be in. Lord, help me to say this without the spirit of offense taking over and them leaving feeling as if someone else just diminished their pain and hurt. I do not want to do that. I know from my past and current situation we will always have a form of wounds. Some will remind us often of our brokenness and others will fade as we mature and we realize no matter what God is with us, and He loves us with a love that we can not fathom. I know everything that I endure, pursue, and engage there is always a risk.

The risk of rejection, hate, coldness, betrayal but, there is always a high reward for forgiveness, mercy, love, compassion, help, and relationship. I know, ‘where you are in the process’ does influence your perception. Being on the other side of a season of being out to sea I have come to this.

When we face a battle, and it seems that we have lost and, we are counted out, discredited, maybe even feel robbed. God can often restore everything if we allow Him to repair. Key is we have to surrender.

There are so many different kinds of restoration that it would take me all day to hit every point. Sometimes, that recovery comes full circle, and you and the other person can walk hand in hand. Sometimes, that restoration only comes with you on one side, Christ in the middle, and the other party on the other side but, still, there is peace. You can not walk together right without Christ in any relationship; without it ending up like a battleship. Abandon and desolate with no signs of a crew or captain; underwater, alone and at the bottom of the sea.

My point is no matter what kind of restoration occurs it is always Christ that is in charge of it, and He knows what is best for you, and He knows what is best for the other party. We need to get that down deep in our minds, hearts, and souls. ( I will repeat that and then wait for that to hit your heart) Restoration in relationships is not our responsibility; Christ is solely responsible for the repair of our relationships. We can not force it, We can not want it and have it in our time. It will come when and as He see’s fit.

For, my friends that are in hopes and waiting for that miracle of restoration with a loved one or just with a fellow brother or sister in Christ or a wayward child. I know you desire it so, and don’t you dare lose hope, keep praying and asking God for His will to be done. God is a God of restoration, and He desires for there to always be restoration, especially to reconcile one back to Him. This is the amazing thing about grace! Amen!

This is God’s heart toward every man, woman, and child! That their souls would be restored back into the hands that knit and weaved their flesh together. Wonderfully and carefully in the hidden place of their mother’s womb. But as you know different kinds of restoration go way beyond our understanding.

In my life, I have often questioned: “Why Lord?” “Why can’t I be around and in their lives anymore?” “Why am I willing and they are not?”, These are all brilliant questions to ask God, but even though we pray, we should respect the fact of God’s answer. Even if it is not what we are looking to hear. I know this is hard; that is why I am writing about it today. I want for just a moment in all your wondering and questioning if you could only see it from His perspective. Like I said this might not apply to you but, if it does then, please hear me out.

When people chose to allow the flesh to overcome (on both sides), there is always extensive damage. I am sure you all have experienced this on some level. I would like to for a moment just say putting the option to be on the right to the side and setting the same possibility of being wrong to the same side, only allow the situation to be. For a minute just imagine the Lord seeing no wrong and no right here ( I know crazy idea right. I promise there is a point) Just imagine seeing two people who He genuinely loves; hurt. In ways only they have expressed to Him; both injuries are valid and painful to hear. He has to ability to see in the future. He knows after an amount of time passes, healing and, lessons must be learned apart from one another. Because, if they remain together they will only see the conflict of their flesh and fail to see the faithfulness of God through their weakness and frailty and keep repeating the same cycle. Looping the same sequence of destruction without any signs of getting off the hamster wheel of self-torture and self-pain.  After the separation, only He knows when it is the exact right moment for two hearts to be reconciled; He is aware of their hearts and minds and souls.

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So, the Lord is sovereign and only good, and He hold’s no ability to lie or deceive (1 John 1:5). You see this is God’s and only God’s expertise and knowledge in our relationship’s. He is the God of timing. He is the God of restoration and love. He is what heals the world of sin and gives us hope and life (John 3:16). He sees all and know’s all (Hebrews 4:13, Psalm 33:13) and believe me He knows how to restore’s (Psalm 23:3). He is in the process of rebuilding all of us; we are all in this together. We must learn and trust Him in all things! Even with the painful and ugly stuff that we bury and hide. He promises if we follow Him that He will never leave nor forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). He vows to give you beauty for ashes (Isaiah 61:3), He promises to provide you with a future and hope (Jeremiah 29:11) just like He promised Israel, He promises that by His stripes we are healed spiritually, physically, emotionally, mentally (Isaiah53:5). He pledges to rebuild the desolate places and the ruins of your life even the areas that have long been devastated even the ones that have been destroyed for generations (Isaiah 61:4). He says He will keep you in perfect peace as long as your mind is steadfastly upon Jesus because you trust Him (Isaiah 26:3) He vows to redeem all parts of you if you believe upon the name of Jesus Christ as your Savior from sin. Probably, my favorite is “Though the mountains are shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has had compassion on you. (Isaiah 54:10) Those are just a few promises, and I will tell you this these are the promises for everyone if they will only believe in their hearts that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and ask Him to come in your heart to do precisely what His word say’s He came to do through Jesus Christ.

I am praying for you, and I am praying that God would do a mighty work in your life! He has mine! I am a stinking miracle! I am forever grateful that nowhere in the Bible says:”He gives up!!” The whole theme of the Bible is His Faithfulness and His story of redemption! Praise God! Never forget He is the keeper of our heart’s, He is the lifter of our heads, and most of all when we slip and stumble in our humanity; He is always faithful and true. <3

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The Road

The Road
The road leading to Christ can be exciting, joyful, mournful, dim, bursting full of light. There will be times of fellowship, and there will be times where no one dares to go with you. There will be loneliness in the physical realm. Rest assured though that you have a friend that sticks closer to you than a brother. (Proverbs 18:24) That is Jesus; He will never leave nor forsake you. In the days of loneliness or maybe you just “feel” like you have a million people around but you “feel” like you have never been more lonely. Let me tell you that in those moments the enemy of God is twisting the reality of your situation and turning your feelings. I will agree that people are disloyal, untrustworthy, uncaring, they betray. They do this because they are flesh, and we know we do not war against flesh and blood, but principalities and darkness, evil rulers of our time. Our fight is spiritual this is where our struggle is!! (Ephesians Chapter 6)

This chapter is a golden chapter today it allows our insight into understanding that human beings betray, are unloyal, uncaring, hateful, abusive, downright mean at times, but this is not to be our focus! Switch it up on the enemy! You are not in the fight alone! If you have Jesus, you have it all! Might not “feel” like it, but as I have told you all before that the heart is deceptive and lies to us regularly (Jer. 17:9). This is why we need the Word of God to check ourselves against every day! To weed out the weeds of the enemy untruth and deception and even our flesh lies and deception away from our hearts so that the seeds of the harvest can grow and take root in our heart. That seed is the Word of God, and it can only be shown by reading, studying, applying, and speaking the Word over and intopathroad your situation.

 

Don’t allow the deception of your feelings keep you in anger, fear, loneliness, anxiety, most of all a prisoner or slave to your emotions. I am not saying opinions don’t matter; I am saying run to the word of God with your feelings and check them. You struggle with them, and I struggle with them but to grow up in Christ, we must tenderly learn that our feelings are deceptive, and the only thing that we can 100 percent rely on is God. Like all the people in the Bible, Christ must become greater, and I must become less. When this process happens, freedom starts to happen The Freedom of Jesus Christ! Oh that my friends, is the sweetest freedom there is. The only freedom that we have in this dying world. Our hope is in you Jesus! Only in You! Sweet one, reading this with tears down your cheeks don’t be discouraged by loneliness, it is just not true. Jesus is right there wiping the tears of your heart.

 

Allow Him to whisper to your heart today and fill you up with His love. We all need it, we all were created for it! Just let Him sweep you off your feet! I am posting the scriptures I want you all to remember, no matter what you are loved, favored, and cared for by the hands of the Living God. You are not alone; He goes with you!

Psalm 25:16-17
Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. The troubles of my heart are enlarged; bring me out of my distresses.

Isaiah 41:10
fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Psalm 68:5-6

Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in this holy habitation. 6 God settles the solitary in a home; he leads out the prisoners to prosperity, but the rebellious dwell in a parched land.

Psalm 147:3
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
A truth that God is with us

 

Matthew 28:20
teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.

 

When you have these feelings and thoughts run to prayer

 

1 Peter 5:7-8
casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. 8 Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.

 

I am praying for you and cheering you on today! Do not think that you are alone for one second! “The God that see’s” as Hagar said Is watching you and has his eye on the situation! He is faithful!

I pray and hope that you find Him today!

Your sister in Christ,

Kim

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